The Big Bang Theory: Howard Wolowitz’s 10 Best Jokes, Ranked – CBR – Comic Book Resources

The Big Bang Theory is one of the longest-running sitcoms, and it stars a group of genius friends and their misadventures in the comic book store and in romance. Each main character has plenty of humor to share, such as the quirky ways of Sheldon Cooper or Penny’s dry observations, but no one is funnier than Howard Wolowitz.

Howard hasn’t had the easiest life, but he always knows how to brighten the room with colorful jokes and gags. He can make people laugh with his celebrity voices, creative ideas, and gadgets from CalTech’s engineering department. Throughout The Big Bang Theory, Howard has had some scene-stealing jokes.

10 When Howard Made A Grid In His Daughter’s Room

In later seasons, Howard and his wife Bernadette became parents, and they had a well-stocked baby room for their infant daughter Halley. The problem was that the wooden floorboards tended to creak a lot, and that made it tough to leave Halley’s room at night when things should be quiet.

In The Romance Recalibration, Howard devised a solution. He would divide the floor into squares, and mark which ones were squeaky. He and Raj used this bizarre method to plot an awkward course to Halley’s crib. Bernadette was equally amused and dismayed by what she saw.

9 When Howard Used The Drake Equation To Calculate Single Women In The Area

Earlier in The Big Bang Theory, none of the four main guys had a romantic partner. In The Hofstadter Isotope, Howard was determined to help the squad meet some local single women. Leonard, Raj, and Sheldon didn’t have any bright ideas, so Howard decided to reinterpret the famous Drake Equation.

The original Drake Equation is meant to estimate how many planets in the universe have intelligent life. Instead, Howard used it to calculate how many suitable single women were in the area. This came from early in Howard’s character arc, when he was particularly desperate for a girlfriend. He even added the Wolowitz Coefficient to his equation – “neediness times dress size squared.”

8 When Howard Sang An Apology Song To Bernadette

Howard started dating the brilliant Bernadette in season 3, and he made an awkward first impression. The two of them dated for a short time until Howard started coming on to Bernadette too strongly, which upset her. Howard tried to fix things but only made it worse.

The relationship was in danger of ending. In The Vengeance Formulation, Howard made a bold move that paid off. He borrowed The Cheesecake Factory’s piano and played a silly but heartfelt song of apology to Bernadette. She found it deeply flattering, and the relationship was saved. Penny was amazed that it worked.

7 When Howard Bought The Sword Of Azeroth

The four main characters of The Big Bang Theory all love to play World Of WarCraft, giving themselves names such as Sheldor and Wolowizard. In The Fuzzy Boots Corollary, the four friends all joined forces in a raid against a massive army of goblins, and they were struggling against this fantasy horde. Then, Sheldon claimed the amazing Sword of Azeroth.

Being true to his roguish character, Sheldon left the party and sold the Sword of Azeroth on eBay, which Raj and Leonard criticized him for. Seconds later, Sheldon noted that someone already bought the sword. Howard, having purchased the sword, got to his feet and proclaimed himself the swordmaster.

6 When Howard Shot A Spitball At Sheldon

At one point, Howard decided to continue his education and attend enough classes to earn his Ph.D., and he wanted Sheldon to be his teacher. Sheldon resisted at first but eventually agreed. As Howard’s teacher, Sheldon was being his usual insufferable self, so Howard got creative.

In The Junior Professor Solution, Howard reasoned that if Sheldon was a bad teacher, he could be a bad student. Like a stereotypical bully, Howard shot a spitball at Sheldon. By sheer chance, the spitball went right into Sheldon’s open mouth, where it stayed for a brief time. Sheldon was convinced he was going to die from a horrible disease in the meantime.

5 When Howard Got Stuck In A Robot Hand

One of Howard’s most embarrassing moments involved bringing home a computer-operated robot arm from work. At first, he used the NASA-worthy robot hand to massage his shoulders. Eventually, he decided to use it for another purpose in the privacy of his bedroom.

Howard soon got a certain body part stuck in the robot arm, and Leonard and Raj were more interested in teasing him for it than helping. The three friends got to the hospital, and a clever nurse simply shut off the arm to relax its grip. Later in The Robotic Manipulation, Howard managed to get himself stuck for a second time.

4 When Howard Imitated Monsters And Celebrities For D&D

Among other games, the four friends like to play Dungeons & Dragons. The group takes turns assuming the role of the DM (dungeon master). Howard can make these fantasy games even more exciting when he mimics the voices of celebrities such as Nicholas Cage or characters such as Tony Montana.

In The Love Spell Potential, the girls joined in. Howard amused everyone with his various celebrity and monster voices, including a sympathetic ogre who lamented the death of his brother in a battle. Even Sheldon, who’s hard to please, enjoyed it greatly.

3 When Howard Used A Rover To Play Baseball

Howard eventually became an official astronaut with an International Space Station experience to his name. He was invited to throw the first pitch at a baseball game, as local tradition allowed. The problem was that Howard had a terrible throw, and even practicing with Raj and Bernadette didn’t help.

In The First Pitch Insufficiency, Howard played to his strengths and had a remote-controlled rover deliver the ball. At first, everyone loved the novelty. When the crowd realized just how slow the rover was, the cheers turned to boos. Howard soon admitted that he hadn’t thought this through.

2 When Howard Had His Naked Revenge In Sheldon’s Spot

Howard had a parking spot at CalTech, and Sheldon challenged him for it, despite not having a car. The two friends began a prank war, and Sheldon even drove Howard’s new SUV nude just to annoy his friend. In The Parking Spot Escalation, Howard didn’t hesitate to strike back.

Howard went for the jugular and sat nude in Sheldon’s beloved spot on his couch, and even rested Sheldon’s laptop on his bare skin. Sheldon was horrified, and he tried to sell the laptop because it was ‘tainted’.

1 When Howard Turned Goth To Impress Goth Girls

Before he got serious with Bernadette, Howard and Raj found all kinds of silly ways to impress girls. One of Howard’s most memorable attempts involved dressing up like a hardcore Goth clubber, complete with a new hairstyle, eyeliner, a cool outfit, and fake tattoo sleeves. In The Gothowitz Deviation, Raj had a similar outfit.

Goth Howard had to be seen to be believed. He tried to act tough around some Goth girls, only for his facade to quickly fall apart in a tattoo parlor. Howard tried to get a Kermit the Frog tattoo until his date suggested a screaming skull instead. After this disaster, Howard and Raj agreed to try to date country girls next time.

NEXT: 10 Times Young Sheldon Referenced The Big Bang Theory

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